Change has often been a subject of this blog, in part
because it is intertwined with everything, and in part because it exists as
perhaps the one constant in this existence. Regardless of all else, things will
change. I have written that change is important for us as people, for Acceptance
Theory, and really, for progress of any kind.
Yet, while acknowledging that change is a constant, we must also realize
that the fact that things will change on their own is no promise that they will
change in the way that we most desire them to. It is for this reason that we
must be vigilant in living the changes we would like to see.
It’s difficult. As I’ve mentioned, change occurs ‘voluntarily’ only when alternatives are worse. Because of this difficulty, even when we have initially made up our minds to change, we may find ourselves slipping back into old habits or situations. Perhaps a temporary comfort convinces us that what we sought to change was not very important after all. Perhaps we look at the scope of what must be changed and we begin to have second thoughts. Whatever the specifics, it is easy to let things run their course and change as they will, rather than the way we would like.
In my conversations with others, I find an attitude of letting life unfold as it will, a contentment with how things develop on their own and simply adapting with it. In truth, this is a part of Acceptance Theory; the allowing of things as they are(provided they are not detrimental). I have also found a different sort of contentment, if one could call it that. A belief that an individual’s actions have no weight, no merit, such that even if one wants to make a change, even if one is suffering or sees the world in a dismal light, there is no point in putting forth the effort, for there will be no return.
As I have said before, that is not Acceptance Theory. Acceptance Theory is the recognition and acknowledgement of individuals as neutral beings with their own quirks and qualities. It is the examining and understanding of practices and traits in order to include one another. If there are characteristics and practices that bring harm to individuals or groups, these must be dealt with- because this harm is the opposite of acceptance, driving people apart and placing some above others. To argue otherwise is to champion this separation and oppression, willingly, knowingly, or otherwise. Allowing things to flow as they will only applies to happenstance, that which naturally occurs, evolves. It does not apply to constructs of ignorance and separation.
Perhaps there are some who argue for this chaos, not for any personal prejudice, but for the opportunity to take advantage. Following a different sort of ‘neutrality’, they are motivated by the self, without regard to the larger picture, written off in any case as ‘unchangeable’. It’s a rather convenient solution. This complacency allows one to avoid the discomfort one would face acknowledging problems in the way things are, or more specifically, the source and solutions for such things. But we should not settle for contentment, especially if we are not actually content. Taking advantage of one another only leads to strife and suffering.
The need for change is as important for the self as it is for the world- or perhaps more so, for we cannot change the latter without changing the former. We as people must determine for ourselves who and what we are going to be. We must understand how our environments affect us, and when we interact with others, we must be mindful to address them and not their traits, and hold them to do the same for us. Furthermore, we must address ourselves in kind as people, rather than our qualities. Perhaps most importantly, we cannot give up on ourselves, because such is the one true way we can deny our change. Even if we look at ourselves and see failure, and look ahead to insurmountable roads, perseverance is important. With the constant of change, we have unlimited potential- to settle for hate or misery(of self, or others) stifles that. It’s no way to live. It’s no way for the world to be.
It’s difficult. As I’ve mentioned, change occurs ‘voluntarily’ only when alternatives are worse. Because of this difficulty, even when we have initially made up our minds to change, we may find ourselves slipping back into old habits or situations. Perhaps a temporary comfort convinces us that what we sought to change was not very important after all. Perhaps we look at the scope of what must be changed and we begin to have second thoughts. Whatever the specifics, it is easy to let things run their course and change as they will, rather than the way we would like.
In my conversations with others, I find an attitude of letting life unfold as it will, a contentment with how things develop on their own and simply adapting with it. In truth, this is a part of Acceptance Theory; the allowing of things as they are(provided they are not detrimental). I have also found a different sort of contentment, if one could call it that. A belief that an individual’s actions have no weight, no merit, such that even if one wants to make a change, even if one is suffering or sees the world in a dismal light, there is no point in putting forth the effort, for there will be no return.
As I have said before, that is not Acceptance Theory. Acceptance Theory is the recognition and acknowledgement of individuals as neutral beings with their own quirks and qualities. It is the examining and understanding of practices and traits in order to include one another. If there are characteristics and practices that bring harm to individuals or groups, these must be dealt with- because this harm is the opposite of acceptance, driving people apart and placing some above others. To argue otherwise is to champion this separation and oppression, willingly, knowingly, or otherwise. Allowing things to flow as they will only applies to happenstance, that which naturally occurs, evolves. It does not apply to constructs of ignorance and separation.
Perhaps there are some who argue for this chaos, not for any personal prejudice, but for the opportunity to take advantage. Following a different sort of ‘neutrality’, they are motivated by the self, without regard to the larger picture, written off in any case as ‘unchangeable’. It’s a rather convenient solution. This complacency allows one to avoid the discomfort one would face acknowledging problems in the way things are, or more specifically, the source and solutions for such things. But we should not settle for contentment, especially if we are not actually content. Taking advantage of one another only leads to strife and suffering.
The need for change is as important for the self as it is for the world- or perhaps more so, for we cannot change the latter without changing the former. We as people must determine for ourselves who and what we are going to be. We must understand how our environments affect us, and when we interact with others, we must be mindful to address them and not their traits, and hold them to do the same for us. Furthermore, we must address ourselves in kind as people, rather than our qualities. Perhaps most importantly, we cannot give up on ourselves, because such is the one true way we can deny our change. Even if we look at ourselves and see failure, and look ahead to insurmountable roads, perseverance is important. With the constant of change, we have unlimited potential- to settle for hate or misery(of self, or others) stifles that. It’s no way to live. It’s no way for the world to be.
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